Many have heard the expression “don’t cry over spilled milk.” Some live by this motto and shame others for crying, calling it childish or unmasculine. Junior Dallas Kinney recalled her parents telling her to “grow up” whenever she cried. Senior Ma Johanne Therese Pedroso believed people who think this way can’t express their own feelings and felt sorry for them. Crying is simply human. After all, people are the only animals who tear up when they’re emotional. It also has many benefits; it helps people feel better, demonstrate their caring side, and bond with others.
Some students said having a good cry brightens their mood. Sophomore Ian Maltez said weeping releases pent-up emotion; Kinney said it relieves stress and can be happy too. However, others thought it depended on the situation. Pedroso said it was her form of malfunctioning and sometimes made her feel weak. However, she also said it’s a mode of expression. Junior Nathaniel Thornton said that crying for school-related reasons made him feel better, while crying for personal reasons made everything seem worse.
Despite the positive feelings, some people still feel embarrassed. When asked if he was ashamed to cry, Maltez responded, “kind of,” but he went on to say that that it just shows you’re emotional and upset. Maltez also said it shows you’re a person with feelings. In a study published by the Cambridge University Press, it was discovered that “tearless cases had less connection with others, less empathy, and experienced less social support, but were equal in emotional well-being.”
Although many students, including Kinney, Thornton, and junior Reshman Amin, only felt ashamed when crying in front of people, crying with others can strengthen relationships. An article published by the National Center for Biotechnology Information referenced another article that claimed crying had many social benefits. It states, “Along these lines, Hasson (2009) analyzed the functions of adult tears from an evolutionary perspective and hypothesized that tears mainly serve interpersonal purposes, such as promoting social bonding and inhibiting aggression and violence in others.” Amin did admit he felt better after crying if he had someone there to console him.
Everyone needs a good cry now and again and they should embrace it\; nothing is too trivial to spill tears over. “We argue that the role of adult tears, in particular, is to remind the crying individual that the situation or event to which they are exposed is something that really matters, not only for the crier him or herself, but also for society at large,” (Vingerhoets and Bylsma).